all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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