New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
