if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
