Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
