Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize