We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
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