I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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