plz talk dirty to me
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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