Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
