I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize
