We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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