Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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