do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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