Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Randomize
