Plan B is the new Plan A
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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