So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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