she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
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