Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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