I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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