I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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