Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
