its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
