i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
