Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Randomize
