halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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