I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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