So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
