There is no way he is gay with that hair.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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