I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
