Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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