I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
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