3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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