So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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