Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
