I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
