I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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