you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
i think im in europe. pls send help
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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