ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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