dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
