Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
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