We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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