He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Randomize