Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
