my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize