I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
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