Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
worst night to have a conscience
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
