is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
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