perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
