i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
