It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
