The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
At least life still wants to fuck me.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize