i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
